Forgive and Forget

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Forgive and forget
That’s what I was told
I struggle with this
If I need to forget, I haven’t fully forgiven
I’ve heard it said
Forgiveness doesn’t change the past
But it does expand the future
So I seek to understand
What happened for them?
What happened for me?
I cast myself into their position
How do things feel from here?
I revisit myself
With kind eyes
I remind myself
We’re all trying our best
We’re all doing the best we can, in that moment, with all of our past and all of our hopes and fears for the future
Alive in that moment
I recognise…’Just like me… they were…’
When I understand
Not in a thinking way
But in a lived experience way
What might have been happening
There’s no need to forget
Indeed I don’t want to
Because I have learnt something valuable
I don’t kid myself that this is easy
Or that it can be done in one sitting
I meet my demons on the way
But I try to hang in there
Until the time arrives
When I experience forgiving them
Is also forgiving myself
At that moment I’m carried to a different place
Where I don’t even need to forgive
I can simply be thankful for another
Deepening gift of life.

©Neil Scotton

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